Oh, fellow explorers of the skyways and savants of the check-in queue, lend me your ears…or more accurately, your eyeballs. I’m here to share a dollop of wisdom or two to seasoned globetrotters and fresh-faced crossing-the-Threshold Thatchers alike. Journey on, my friends, for the following is your golden guide to mastering the art of air travel. Keep calm and carry on, right up to the point you’re sipping cocktails at 35,000 feet.
Navigating the Nebulous World of Airfare
Now let’s face it, airfare costs can sometimes be as predictable as a scorned raccoon in a rubbish bin. But guess what? They don’t have to be. If you’re anticipating an upcoming leisure trip, try setting up airfare alerts on travel sites like Skyscanner or Kayak. Be flexible with your travel dates, depart in the midweek if possible and dare to take a crack at dawn or red-eye flights. Keeping an eye on airline social media accounts for deals won’t hurt either!
In-flight Entertainment – More Than Just Movie Marathons
Don’t just rely on the in-flight entertainment system, unless your idea of fun is watching “The Emoji Movie” thrice back-to-back. Download your favourite content on your device or invest in a good-quality travel book. Remember, in-flight Wi-Fi is about as reliable as a chocolate tea kettle.
The Conundrum of Carry-Ons
The key here is balance, lords and ladies. You don’t want to stuff your carry-on bag like a Thanksgiving turkey, but you do want to squeeze in essential things: a change of clothes (because the Travel Gods are fickle), toiletries, snacks, and something to entertain you – like that thick fantasy novel or those noise-cancelling headphones to drown out the cacophony of babies, chatty neighbours, and engine drones.
Food? Thought You’d Never Ask
Oh, the gastronomy sky-high! The cardinal rule of plane food is, there is no rule. While some of you may crave the eclectic assortment of meals hovering at an average temperature of ‘luke-warm’, others might prefer to BYOF (Bring Your Own Food). Protein bars, fruit, or bite-sized snacks always hit the spot. Hydration is key! Plane air is drier than a camel’s sneeze, so keep that water-bottle handy.
Choosing Your Throne
Window standing for the view lovers, aisles for the I-need-to-go-six-times-during-this-flight folks. If you need more legroom and don’t mind a smidge less recline, opt for the exit rows. Don’t forget to check out airline seat maps on SeatGuru for the most comfortable (or least uncomfortable?) seats.
Getting through the Gauntlet – Security Checks
Be prepared to undress faster than Superman in a phone booth. Empty pockets, belt and shoes off, laptops and liquids separately. Check the TSA guidelines prior to travel. PS: Don’t joke about bombs, the TSA have been trained exclusively to not find this funny.
So, there you have it, winged knights and flighty maidens! These tips will have you soaring above the clouds in no time, enjoying your air travel experience rather than silently cursing it. Until next time, safe travels and remember, the sky’s the limit!